Emotional bonding, attachment, or the English term “attachment” refer to the mutual emotional relationship that gradually develops between a child and the person closest to them. A baby’s experiences during the first year of life can significantly influence their basic sense of trust and, later on, their ability to form harmonious relationships. In the first part of the article, you’ll learn how wanted and unwanted children differ in adulthood; what contributes to the formation of a secure attachment; and why feeding is more than just the provision of nutrients. The second part of the article describes the four stages of attachment formation according to the child’s age and the most common types of parents who struggle with providing sensitive care. Attachment and its impact on adult relationships are currently the focus of numerous research studies both abroad and in the Czech Republic.
The Importance of Accepting Pregnancy
Parent-child relationships begin to form as early as during pregnancy. The mother’s mood and more pronounced emotional reactions, accompanied by biochemical changes, are transmitted to the fetus through the bloodstream. For example, in the last trimester, the unborn child responds to sensory stimuli by moving and kicking. The importance of parents’ relationships with their unborn child is evidenced by frequent complications during pregnancy, including spontaneous miscarriages. Internal rejection can thus lead to the “expulsion of the unwanted” (Shaffer, 1989). In a well-known study conducted in Czechoslovakia (Matejček et al., 2005) , the authors followed children whose parents’ requests for an abortion had been denied. They compared this group of 200 “unwanted” children with children of the same age group and socioeconomic background. The children were followed from birth until the age of 29. Although all children were healthy at birth, the “unwanted” ones were hospitalized more frequently over the next 9 years, had poorer grades in school, experienced less stable family lives, had worse relationships with their peers, and were generally more irritable than the “wanted” children. Compared to the control group, they exhibited more problematic relationships with themselves and those around them. Women in this group were more likely to be divorced and had experienced pregnancy termination at a young age. It appears that being unwanted—that is, internal rejection—manifests itself not only as emotional “hunger” but also in the parent’s failure to serve as a good model of partner behavior (Vymětal, 1994).
Sensitive responsiveness to the child
close contact with the newborn in the first hours after birth can strengthen the parents’ positive feelings toward the child. A true emotional bond is gradually built through interaction between parent and child after the first few months. An important element in building this bond is the creation of ritualized activities and habits. It is essential for the caregiver to respond to the child sensitively. For example, if a baby turns its head away and looks confused while playing a game, it indicates that the activity is too much for the baby. The parent senses this and gives the child a break, returning to the activity after a short while. This is how a relationship and mutual understanding are built. If the caregiver responds reliably, the child develops a sense of trust in others.
Feeding, Warmth, and Touch
Feeding is a powerful source of positive feelings for the child, which contribute to the formation of an emotional bond. However, Harlow and Zimerman’s 1959 experiment also demonstrates the importance of other sensory experiences. Macaques were separated from their mothers on the first day of life and spent the next 165 days in the presence of two surrogate “mothers.” Both of these mothers had faces and bodies made of wire, and one of them was covered with soft fabric. Half of the infants were fed by this warm, comforting surrogate mother, while the other half were fed by the uncomfortable wire “mother.” It turned out that the infants spent time with the wire mother only during feeding. When they were upset or afraid, they immediately ran to the cloth mother. The importance of warmth and touch in children was described by Schanberg and Field (1987, in Kassin, 2007). The authors performed body massages on premature infants for 10 days and then compared their development with that of infants who did not receive massages. Both groups consumed the same amount of infant formula, but the massaged infants gained 47% more weight and were livelier, more active, and better coordinated. They were discharged from the hospital an average of 6 days earlier. According to Field, touch is a valuable therapeutic tool—not only for premature infants, but also for children and adults who are “touch-deprived.” Feeding is no more important for human infants than it is for baby monkeys—thermal comfort and a sense of security are what matter most.
Sources:
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De Wolff, M.S., & van IJzendoorn, M.H. (1997). Sensitivity and attachment: A meta-analysis on parental antecedents of infant attachment. Child Development, 66, 571-591.
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Kassin, S. (2009). Psychology. Brno: Computer Press.
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Matějček, Z. (2005). Selected Works. Prague: Karolinum.
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Schaffer, D. R. (1989). Developmental Psychology: Childhood and Adolescence (2nd ed.). Pacific Grove, Calif.: Brooks/Cole.
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Schanberg, S.M., & Field, T.M. (1987). Sensory deprivation stress and supplemental stimulation in the rat pup and the preterm human neonate. Child Development, 58, 1431–1447.
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Vymětal, J. (1994). Medical Psychology. Prague: J. Kocourek.
